caution, contents may be hot

Love

To: Kevin

From: Ashley

I think you know how much I adore you, but I’m going to say it again. I treasure every minute we spend together. I couldn’t have asked for a better stage companion than you. You have challenged me to grow as an actress on stage, and have encouraged me to become a more positive and loving person off stage. My heart stings with sadness every time I realize that I won’t get to see you every day after the show closes; you bring such intense joy into my life. Your talents are many, and I can’t wait to take the stage alongside you.

To: Ashley

From: Kevin

Just checking. You’re that dark haired girl right? I’m so bad with names

Nobody saw.

Confession: I don’t keep chocolate in my home because I am ridiculously bad at impulse control. Like, I am the morbidly-obese-grade-school-girl trying to play dodgeball of impulse control. If a chocolate craving hits, nothing can help me.

But… I keep baking chocolate. This wouldn’t be an issue if I hadn’t discovered that I could mix Splenda and Baking Chocolate and coat Various Things to make Chocolate-Covered-Various-Things.

Or, you know, I could just spoon the Splenda & Chocolate mix straight into my mouth… which is what I was doing tonight.

Splenda & Chocolate, or Splocolate as I’ll call it, is rather dangerous. Inhaling it is all too easy, especially when trying to shovel it down the hatch for chocolate-craving-satiation purposes. It’s also the food that makes me feel like a food-addict, because it’s never something I’d EVER eat in front of someone else… not just because it’s ridiculous, but because it coats your teeth and makes your smile look like that of the old witch from Snow White.

But I discovered a new hazard today, apart from browning teeth and inhalation dangers.

I love when I’m watching something that’s so funny that it makes me laugh out loud, even when I’m all by myself. I have recently discovered (a few moments ago) that I don’t love laughing out loud INTO my cup of powdery Splocolate. You know that scene in Mary Poppins where the kid puts his face in the chimney and it gets covered with soot? That basically happened to me.

The worst part was nobody seeing it. Not that it was THAT funny, but imagine all the ridiculous things that are caught on tape… and you realize the number of ridiculous things that go by undocumented.

Or, you know, just imagine yourself doing something more useful than reading a random blog from someone with a face covered in powdered chocolate mix.